Birth of a new year..

The new baby's about to come, the head is crowning. God the Father and Mother Nature have named this baby TwothousandandSIX. You can almost hear him cry. For with his birth, it brings many possibilities and hope, you know he will be with us for just one year then he will have a new sibling but that is in the future, we are talking about the now. In three days time, he will make his first cry, joined by millions of people around the world who shout with joy, albeit some drunk joy, that the New year, the new baby is here.


Many reflect, in my family it's a time for forgiveness, a time where old hurts are washed away literally and figuratively. Visions of us kids hiding on the top of the roof pouring ice-cold water down unto unsuspecting adults come to mind. Everyone is wet, everyone is washed clean, tears are diluted and everyone is happy. For the new baby year is here. So much hope. so much love. So much to give...


My new years resolutions

• Bring about world peace *or argue less with people*
• Work smarter to get that promotion
• Re-fine my pastry skills
• Love more.
• Finally get fit! a.k.a lose 10kgs
• Listen more to people without bias or prejudice
• Read more
• Surround myself with genuinely nice people.
• Be more tolerant, less a slave to gossip and more a friend to empathy.

Happy New Year Duckies. 2005 has been a rollercoaster for me.

Fun, guilty, exciting, excruciating, used, envigorating and eye opening.

Come new years let us make it a point to be kinder and better souls.

***watch this space***

Suggestion : Get a couple of friends, dress up in school uniform and smoke outside the school gates during monday assembly.

~chuckles~

Merry Drinkmas and a Tipsy New Year

Have yourself a wasted little Christmas

Let your wine be white

From now on we'll throw out all the coke and sprite!

Have yourself a lil sherry this Christmas

make your tippisiness stay

Til New Year your soberness is miles away

Here we are Happy-hour day

Whisky sour days or more

Drinking friends who get drunk with us

Get pissed near to us once more

Through the week we all will be a sipping

Beer like Kobe cows

Hang a left! Avoid the police check somehow!

And have yourself a hangover this Christmas now

**Sung to the tune of *duh* 'Have yourself a merry little Christmas'

Not so perfect

Love, ah me.

Being in love is the greatest feeling on earth. Like you didn't know that. You know it. The fuzzy wuzzy funnies in your tummy. The I-can't-wait-to-touch-him-again feeling. Being in love makes you do irrational things. You'd buy him seven pairs of socks just so he's got one for every day of the week. You'd fake an illness for a hot session in bed. You'd tell your friends you've gone back to your hometown when you're actually in bed together for the whole time then tell your workmates how fantastically boring it was back there it was that you didn't know why you balik kampung in the first place.

Being in love makes you lie. ~chuckles~ makes you steal time, cheat death and run up a thousand dollar phone bill.






Then the rhythm sets in, you're home, he's not. He's home, you're too tired to layan him. The laundry piles up and you wonder where the heck your mad money went to. The very things that made you crazy for him is driving you mad. The way he walks, the way he talks in front of friends, the way he always wants things for him on his terms.

"You're in love, that's the way, it should be, and I want you to be happy...."

You get used to each other then the"in" part of being in love drops out and hopefully you still love each other. Love each other enough to be together and live out your dreams. Love each other enough to look past the not-so-perfect things you and him have intrinsically. Love each other enough to be truthful to each other. Sometimes love each other enough to let go.

"What is love? baby don't hurt me, no more..."

Though things are not-so-perfect, he still loves you. You still love him. Maybe you should brave the storm together because you've got each other bad or good, weak or strong, rich or poor.

It's a good thing that they lgalised gay marriages in the UK, then people would think twice about just breaking it and going on a sex-spree because "it's not like we're married or anything" . This thing is called responsibility. Taxes, paying the rent, mopping up vomit, picking up the dirty underwear, cleaning out the sink, buying the groceries...

Maybe I'm just a traditionalist... my parents don't believe in divorce, neither do I.....



Maybe I'm just in denial because I am being used.



Maybe I just need a good fuck to get over it all.



Maybe I just need him.....

Meanwhile I'll just hang in there.

~chuckles~

~sighs~

Blissfully Yours

Even you'd feel like a star walking up those brightly lit steps toward velvety curtains and hearing the thumpthump thump of music as you enter. Good morning boys. Bodies gyrating, hips grooving, sunglasses worn and half smiles bestowed on the cute boy passing you by.

It's 1am and it's just beginning to fill up. Everyone's there. Young trying to look older so as to belie their teens, older men trying to look younger so as to belie their impending second childhoods. The music is loud. Then there is the hellos and how-a-yas? to pseudo friends and kindred spirits.

Then I see him, deep set eyes, shadow of a goatee *be still my heart* and a smile on his lips. I chuckle at the young indonesian boy hanging on to him for dear life.

"What do I do? I didn't do anything and he's all over me" says he. Like you don't like it baby. He's cute and young and willing. Just have some fun-lah. The music is thumping. The music is loud.

I can see he doesn't want to. He's playing the role. Just like the one he plays with his straight family and straight friends. On one hand he's a good Catholic boy who listens to his parents and works in a shirt and tie. On the other he's a gay boy. fullstop.

Catholic gay boy. Oh aren't we a rare race? ~laughs~

He's confused with boundaries and comfort zones. Although both have their limits but the latter is self inflicted and one is happy to be in it because it's where we can be totally ourselves and not pick up our used socks from off the floor for days on ends. Why put ourselves in a quandary when we can just not push it and be ourselves. It's the same with his other boys. It's all done in secret. Liasons only known after the fact. After the deed. After the breakup indeed. "I break people's hearts" says he. You don't have to baby. You don't have to do a lot of things like lead beautiful girls, who will make excellent mothers, on a leash when you don't intend to go for the slightest bit of a walk with them.

The music gets louder and louder before it melts away into some unidentified 80s hit and then the lights come on.

We gather ourselves and get going, with aforementioned cute indonesian boy in tow. We send the boy home. The boy is hopelessly in love already. I can see it.

work. nap. workworkwork.

~~~~~~~~~yawns~~~~~~~~~~~

Been surviving on three hours sleep a day for the past 8 days. Work has been hectic to say the least.
The laundry is piling up, my hair needs a cut but I LOVE the Christmas setting at the Pastry buffet at work!
It looks like we're in the middle of a snow storm... frosty pine branches, gingerbread houses groaning under the weight of royal icing snow and a chocolate santa smiling down on the guests. heheh I'm tired, real tired but sights of Christmas coupled with piped christmas music just makes me wanna say JOY TO THE WORLD!

~chuckles~

I'm off tommorow...

a time to sleep

a time to clean

a time to recharge

a time to finally make some unplanned mischief!

~chuckles~

13 days to Christmas people!

Spread that Good Cheer Around!

Wazza is O.U.T!

Merry Merry Merry

Ginger bread houses, chocolate trains, star shaped cookies, chocolate santas and elves, yule logs, Christmas candle cakes, fruitcake, Christmas pudding.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitttt's beginnin to look a lot like Christmassssssssssssssssss

EEEEEEEEEEEEverywhere you go...

~chuckles~

They're even playing Christmas Songs at the Coffee House at the hotel.

21 days to Christmas and counting.

I don't know why I'm so excited about it this year ~laughs~

Getting nostalgic I think..

Slummin it

Things I eat when I feel like slummin it.

It's gotta be trashy or kitsch but totally delicious.

1) Cheezy wedges from KFC

2) Auntie Anne's Jalapeno Pepper Pretzels

3) Minnesota Twins Hotdog Combo from 1901

4) Cheezles - Large Bag

5) Pepperidge Farms White chocolate and macadamia nut cookies

6) Japanese Crepe stuffed with a whole snickers bars

7) Indo-Mie - original Flavour

8) Curry Puff from IKEA

9) Fried chocolate banana sandwich

10) Butterscotch pecan cookies from Famous Amos

They're sure to lift the spirits! Try one Today.